I've decided to do a series of blogs over the next few weeks, entitled: Don't let your communication be k@k! (DLYCBK!)
Before we go any further... I want to address the title of the series. Let’s be honest, it is a kak title! But, don’t you love the irony of it? (Naturally, my Mom is horrified, and has been wanting me to change it since she has heard what I’m calling it, sorry Ma! It's not changing).
"What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?" ~ Vincent Van Gogh
kak (ˈkʌk) [Afrikaans]
(South African taboo) rubbish, nonsense, malarkey, garbage, faeces, shit. Collins Thesaurus of the English Language
Kak
communication skills is the one thing that we all have in common. As with all
things, some people are just so much more talented and naturally gifted at
being kak communicators than others. Do you find that you tend to be more on
the receiving end of someone flexing their kak communication muscle or, are you
the kak communicator? Some things need to be learnt, while other
things need to be unlearnt.
Having studied communication management was, I will admit, rather ironic, ask anyone from my previous (and in fact, current) relationships, and they would attest to the fact that verbal communication has never been my strong suite. I have been known to rely fairly heavily on telepathic communication in many instances.
But, being fairly obsessed with building reputations over the last 20~odd years, the crux of a reputation is relationship building which is driven by communication. This blog series is aimed at helping people to improve their communication skills.
The aim of the series is not to delve into the academics and theory of communication, ok, perhaps a bit, but the purpose is to look at the basics of communication, on a more personal and practical level to improve relationships. All the examples shared in the series, are based on my own personal experiences.
I have had some very
interesting relationships and interactions in my life. Some magical, other disastrous. But, I
have learnt something from every single one of them; the biggest lesson being
that relationships are ruined by kak communication. They say that the same
thing happens to you because there is a lesson that needs to be learnt. The
lesson stops crossing your path only once you have learnt it. Often, these
lessons are caused by poor, or let us just call it what it is, kak
communication.
“Nothing ever goes away until it teaches
us what we need to know,” Pema Chödrön
The DLYCBK! series includes advice on
how to stop your kak communication and will cover:
- Etiquette. Know
the basic communication rules. Please and thank you will never go out of
fashion. Spell and pronounce names correctly, confirm meetings, show up for
them and when you are invited to someone’s house, rock up with a gift.
- When not to communicate Steer
away from communicating when you are tired, hungry, emotional, drunk, or only
when you need something.
- How not to communicate Everyone
has their ‘go-to’ channel of communication that they prefer. Looking at the
different channels of communication for different scenarios and
generations. Did you know that different
generations have their communication preferences?
- Communicating in the work environment
- Where to start It all starts with values, and respect for yourself and for others. Treat, and communicate with others like you want to be treated and communicated with, just don’t be kak)
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